It Hurts, Make It Stop!
So you may be going through something right now that you wish would stop. Heartache from the moment you wake up, that lasts all day until the moment you fall asleep. You’ve broken up with your ex and now it hurts… BAD!
Stop And Think About What You Want
Well, you may have thought to yourself this feeling will go eventually… all I have to do is keep going until then. But what if you’re not sure you want to go it alone. You maybe thinking, screw this, I have to get my ex back now! Whoa there… hold your horses! You need to spend some time thinking this through long and hard. Perhaps write up a pros and cons list and see if there are enough Pros to outweigh the Cons of your ex partner. If not, you should think about moving on…seriously. It’s tough, I’m not going to lie, but you can do it. Millions of people have done it before you and will continue to do it. You can get some great advice on how to move on as a single person. There are many new and exciting people out there wanting the same as you.
I Have To Get My Ex Back
If however the Pros do outweigh the Cons, then there are things you can do to help yourself. But please, please don’t rush into anything just yet. You probably will only make the situation between you and your ex worse by running full steam ahead to win them back. You can help yourself start feeling better by being pro-active. Don’t get me wrong, this will take some elbow grease on your part, so you’ll have to roll up those sleeves and get cracking!
You Come First
You can make a start by working on yourself. You need to start working on your core wants and needs to fulfil yourself and keep your life full. In the mean-time, try to cut all ties with your ex… I know that sounds hard and not what you want to do at all, but you’ll need this time for yourself. Your ex will still be there when you’re feeling better so try not to panic.
Look After Your Health
To start I can recommend keeping healthy. If you don’t already exercise on a regular basis, how about taking up a fun new activity. It doesn’t have to be the most energetic sport in the world, just something to keep you active. This has lots of benefits, not just for physical health, but for mental health too. You can also meet new people and make new friends or contacts at a new badminton club for instance, or indoor ski club. How about martial arts or a new gym class?
Get looking and see what’s out there in your area that you always liked the look of, but have been putting it off or weren’t sure about doing. Getting yourself out there and socialising is great for your sense of well being. Why not take a friend along for company.
Watch What You Eat
Eating right is also a must. Get online and find out about good nutrition and what you should be eating to keep healthy. With these two things alone you may even lose a few pounds and start feeling better. It’s all too easy to binge eat or not eat when you break up. Both aren’t good for you so look after yourself. Your body will thank you for it.
Get socialising
Get out there and start a new hobby/interest or try that thing you’ve been meaning to do for ages. Meet new people and build up a social life again. See old friends and go and see family you haven’t seen for a while. Rebuild old connections and create new ones! All this will keep you busy and get you feeling better.
Treat Yourself
Another good thing to do is to treat yourself – Get a new haircut, get some new threads and a new smell, by that I mean a new cologne/aftershave or perfume. Creating a new look will give you a much needed confidence boost and it all helps you with your ex when you next see them. If you’ve been vigilant you should now be feeling better, have your own life and you’ll be looking better. Your ex will notice this. You’ll hopefully be less desperate and feeling happier on the inside. This will show on the outside. This is where the attraction can reignite between you as they see you in your happy place. This is no doubt where you were when you met and is what attracted you to them.
Meet Your Ex For Drink
So, you’re in a better place and now it’s time to go see your ex. Don’t go full-on and try and spend all of your time with them, but start out for just a drink with them for say 30-45 mins and leave it there for your first encounter. This is your chance to show them how in control you are and how you’re no longer desperate. You should have plenty to say about what you’ve been up to since they last saw you with your new full social life. Try and avoid any conversations which hark back to the bad times in your relationship and concentrate on the good stuff. Keep it light and don’t forget, anything you don’t get chance to say this time, say it next time. Keep to the time schedule, remember 30-45mins max.
Perhaps next time you could go for dinner/movie. Again, keep it light and don’t try to rush prematurely. Just get used to being around each other again.
If you’d like a more in-depth step-by-step guide that will help you on you journey from your current situation to getting back with your ex, then it might be worth reading my Magic of Making Up Review, so you can see what’s included in this great book – It helped me immensely on my own journey and it’s my #1 recommendation on this site! P.S. – Keep an eye out for the powerful “Fast Forward technique” 😉
